What's Love Got To Do With Business?

Updated: Mar 20

We've all heard the words, "it's business, not personal," but when it comes to being an entrepreneur, where is the line? Spending every day pouring myself into my business makes it feel very much like a love affair. So, when is it appropriate to share "feelings?" and when are emotions unprofessional and oversharing?


This week, I decided that my work style was too different from someone who I was trying to work with. And, I decided to end the relationship before it started. Why? Feelings.


1) Gut Feelings


Since early in my career, I have been told I have great instincts and have been told to go with them. It's taken me a long time to listen. This time, it took me less time to hear my gut yelling at me.


Throughout the past three years in the cannabis industry, I have learned that not everyone defines integrity as I do; keeping your word. This is a core value of mine, and I need to listen to my gut when I feel that boundary being crossed.

Perhaps it has to do with how many deals are discussed under the influence of the plant that makes it seem like everything is gonna be alright? But, the over-promising and under-delivering, or worse, ghosting, is rampant.

2) Ghosting


Ghosting in dating is defined as ending all communication with someone without any explanation. But, in business it's a little different.


The scenario goes like this:

  • "I am so excited to work with you, we are going to do all of this work together, I can't wait."

  • Next, it gets fun and exciting for a few weeks while you imagine all of the possibilities that might come from working together, texts fly, ideas percolate.

  • Then, one of the parties stops responding, only responds to questions they want to while leaving others out, and begins acting like the initial conversation was not as passionate (I know not a biz term, but it applies).

  • Finally, deadlines slip, promises start to unravel and communication dries up.

Last week I told the other party that I was feeling ghosted. I figured I would try a different approach and share my feelings without also going dark. I hadn't heard from this person since February 15th when they said we'd start work together on March 1st. It was now March 11th. I guess I hoped they'd apologize for creating that feeling with someone they wanted to work with -- we are talking about a partnership-sized deal. But, they did not. Instead, they chose to tell me that they were right. That's when I decided we weren't a fit.


3) Passion


What a creepy word to use in business! Passion is defined as: strong and barely controllable emotion. When you are an entrepreneur, everything about your business is done with passion. There's no way you would be able to keep going if you didn't have it. But passion is an emotion, and it is often confused with love.


True passion for your work feels like love. It makes you stay up all night working toward your goals and it drives you to want to see your vision come to fruition. You become fiercely protective of that passion. When I meet someone who I believe shares my passion for helping people, for growing businesses and for the future of the cannabis industry, I begin to share that passion. When it's unrequited, it feels like a broken heart.


I used to be much better at separating my emotions from my work. In fact, I used to compromise my values in the name of Capitalism all the time. I understood that the abusive client was paying the agency $150K/month and my salary was a trade off for me making that client believe that I was her best friend.


But, after not making a big salary (or any salary for that matter) for 3 years, I have realized that my emotions are way more valuable than money. And, when it's not a fit, I get to move on even when it's leaving a lot of money on the table.





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